I heard you’ve got a beard that need opening. No Drunk Uncle, it’s a beer. But you can help. With the SNL Drunk Uncle Journal & Bottle Opener you can open your beer, take notes, and hear a quote from Bobby Moynihan’s hysterical character. Every time you open a bottle, the opener speaks 10 newly recorded Drunk Uncle phrases:

“Beer me, beer me…”
“Can you BEER me now?”
“So I didn’t make the big catch, OK?”
“Brrrf!”
“Immigrants!”
“When I was a kid, we opened beers with our teeth.”
“YOU press one for English.”
“Suspenders, cane, monocle, top hat, fancy!”
“…That’s not me.”
“Is this… is this Wi-Fi organic?”

It comes with a journal too, so you can jot down your own drunken ramblings. This is Bif Bang Pow!’s first item from their forthcoming Saturday Night Live collection and it’s launching exclusively at this year’s Comic-Con in San Diego (find the Entertainment Earth booth) in a limited edition of just 600. If any Drunk Uncles are left unsold, you can buy them at the link below (pre-order now actually).

SNL’s Drunk Uncle Talking Bottle Opener