Tag Archives: Geek Wear

Pac-Man Ghosts Of Christmas Past Ugly Christmas Sweater

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An officially licensed piece of Bandai Namco merchandise, the Ghosts Of Christmas Past Ugly Christmas Sweater, available from Merchoid, features everybody’s favorite dot-munching giant yellow mouth Pac-Man, as well as ghosts Blinky (red), Pinky (pink), Inky (cyan), and Clyde (orange). They call it an ugly Christmas sweater, but that’s really doing it a disservice because there’s nothing ugly about it. It’s absolute beauty in its purest form.

Available in sizes XS – XXXXL, the woven sweater is 100% acrylic and includes a level in the shape of a Christmas tree, as well as some snowflakes (including Pac-Man eating some on the sleeves), and WAKA WAKA WAKA around the shoulders and elbows. I still can’t get over somebody actually calling this ugly. Do they even have eyes?

Just to be clear, if you wear this to a Christmas party and win the ugly sweater contest it was strictly due to the nostalgia the sweater evokes and not because it’s ugly. Because it’s not. It belongs in a museum right next to the Cross of Coronado that Indiana Jones is always after.

Microsoft Released a Windows XP Bliss Wallpaper Christmas Sweater

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Inspired by Bliss (originally titled Bucolic Green Hills), the default wallpaper for Windows XP operating systems, Microsoft is selling this Windows Ugly Sweater: Bliss Edition for just $70. The knit soft-wear is constructed of 55% cotton, 45% acrylic, and is 100% eye candy. I can’t believe they’re even calling it ugly; it’s absolutely beautiful.

Am I going to show up for an ugly Christmas sweater party in one? Unfortunately not, because they’ve already sold out of most sizes. They say the early bird gets the worm, and I am by no means an early bird. I am an owl. Just without the wisdom. I do bite Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pops though.

‘Bliss’, captured by photographer Charles O’Rear in the wine country of California in 1996 and purchased by Microsoft in 2000, is thought to be the most viewed photograph in the world, being viewed by billions of people. And now you can own it on a sweater a lot of young people won’t even recognize! They’re missing out though, XP was probably my favorite operating system of all time.

[via TechEBlog]

Microsoft Selling $25 Hoodies for Xbox Controllers

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Because things stopped making sense a long time ago, Microsoft is selling official Xbox Mini Controller Hoodies, so your gaming controllers don’t get cold when they’re not in your sweaty palms. They’re making them in black and white, but the first pre-order already sold out, so clearly, people want these. Why people want them is what I really want to know.

So decorative hoodies for your Xbox controllers are a real product that exists now. Did we need them? Of course not. Am I jealous Sony isn’t selling these for Playstation controllers? With all my heart. Get it together, Sony; my controllers are gonna catch a cold!

It’s only a matter of time before there are entire clothing lines for gaming controllers: novelty t-shirts, hats, flip-flops — you name it. Can you sew? Because we need to start an Etsy store pronto to cash in on this craze. People are crazy, and we have to monopolize. I’ll start sketching some controller fatigues for all the Call Of Duty players. We’re gonna be rich!

[via ReviewGeek]

Metal Biomechanical Spine Armor Is Battle Cyborg Ready

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Developed and built by Etsy shop BionicConcepts, this biomechanical metal spine armor features everything you’d look for in new spine armor, like cool looks and light-up effects. The cyberpunk-style spine is constructed from aluminum and will be worn daily by yours truly. I just need to cut a huge hole out of the back of my sofa first so I can relax comfortably.

Available in raw aluminum and black finishes, the cyborg spines start at around $710 for a silver (raw metal) model with a single color light, up to $910 for one with a black finish and RGB lighting. I’m probably going to compromise and get the silver with RGB lighting for $837, with a special request to mark the box it comes in ‘NOT ANOTHER CYBORG SPINE HONEY, I SWEAR.’

Don’t have the money to buy one of these spines? Head to the junkyard and get the parts to construct your own. Just make sure you’re up to date on your tetanus shot first. Also, maybe not trying to visit the junkyard after regular business hours under the cover of darkness because I was definitely shot at.

These Realistic Owls Mittens Are a Real Hoot

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Owls: they’re the rulers of the forest night. Hooting and swooping down on their unsuspecting prey under the cover of darkness, eating rodents in their entirety. And now you can have a pair on your hands, thank to these knitted Owl Mittens (affiliate link). Thankfully, the owl mittens only feature the likenesses of owls but aren’t made from actual birds. That’s a relief, especially if you have owl relatives.

Available in five different mitten colors, each glove has a realistic snow owl on the back of the hand. Unfortunately, they’re only available in one standard women’s size, though, so I probably won’t be able to squeeze my big bear paws into them. Which is a shame because I love owls and warm hands.

I just bought a pair for my wife so I can live vicariously through her. Plus, with owl mittens, if you ever lose one, at least it’ll be easy to describe. IT HAS AN OWL ON IT. Looks real, but don’t be afraid though – it’s just a mitten.

[via DudeIWantThat]

Enso Silicone Space Rings: Celestial Digits

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Enso makes a line of celestial themed rings printed with cool space patterns like the phases of the moon, a solar eclipse, and what I assume are some sort of alien glyphs. Maybe if we can decipher them, we’ll discover the secrets of interstellar travel! They’re made from comfortable silicone, so you don’t feel like the ring is suffocating your finger like a traditional wedding band (maybe I’m just projecting),

The rings are available in whole sizes 3 to 14 and, just like all Enso silicone products, come with a lifetime guarantee. So if you somehow do manage to destroy your ring, they’ll replace it. And, God willing, you’ll learn not to do whatever it was you were doing when you destroyed it in the first place because it’s probably dangerous. I just hope you still have your finger.

I actually bought a silicone wedding band to wear whenever I’m exercising or working in the garage, which is still in the package it came in because I haven’t been to the gym, and I don’t have a garage. I’m prepared, though; that’s the important thing.

[via The Awesomer]

Squatty Slides Footwear Turn Every Toilet Into a Squatty Potty

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Created by Matty Benedetto of Unnecessary Inventions, Squatty Slides are a pair of footwear with extendable bases to raise your legs into the optimal position for taking care of business. And by taking care of business, I mean pooping, just to be clear. Probably too clear. My guess is you already knew what I was talking about.

The Squatty Slides feature a compartment on the bottom that opens, extending the platforms, and, after twisting them to lock into place, are ready for action. Hopefully not any crazy action, though. Hopefully just some healthy, regular action thanks to a well-rounded diet and not Taco Bell for lunch AND dinner.

Are Squatty Slides practical for regular wear? Probably not, considering they appear to be made of hard, 3D-printed plastic. I guess you could wear them around the house, though, but then why wouldn’t you just put an actual Squatty Potty in the bathroom? Maybe this is where the ‘unnecessary’ in Unnecessary Inventions comes from.

[via Neatorama]

Butt Be Dry Waterproof Seating Pad: So Long, Soggy Pants!

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Because nobody likes a wet butt (I only face forward in the shower), the Butt Be Dry (affiliate link) is a portable seating pad to prevent the back of your pants from getting soaked while sitting on a wet seat. Perfect for sports stadiums and the great outdoors, it probably won’t prevent you from getting wet if you decide to sit in a pool, just to be clear.

The 18″ wide pad rolls up to just 3″ when not in use and can be worn around the waist like a fanny pack for hands-free transportation. Available in blue, light blue, green, and camouflage, I can’t recommend buying the camo version unless you want to lose it on a camping trip. I could have sworn I set it on a tree stump around here somewhere!

Alternatively, do what my wife does whenever she doesn’t want to sit on a wet seat and sit on my lap. Why should two people have to suffer when only one can, and that person be you – that’s her motto. Such an angel.

[via DudeIWantThat]

Angler Fish Luminescent Flip-Flops: Slide Into The Deep Sea

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Inspired by the deep sea angler fish, these slides from HelloSlippers feature a cartoon version of the goofy-looking fish, complete with a glow-in-the-dark lure dangling above your feet. Granted, I’m not sure what you’re going to catch wearing these at night, but I’d count my toes afterward.

The slides are available in eleven different colors and six different sizes that fit feet from a women’s 4.5 to a men’s 12.5. They also include a shark fin to replace the angler fish’s lure (seen below), effectively making them two pairs of slides for the price of one! Personally, I’m going to wear one shark and one angler fish slide. And, if I’m being perfectly honest, probably on the wrong feet.


Are they bright enough to light my way to the fridge for a midnight snack without having to turn all the lights on between the bedroom and kitchen to prevent ghost attacks? You can rest assured I plan on finding out! And if they do, maybe my wife will stop making me sleep in the guest bedroom.

7-Eleven Crocs: Convenience Store Colab

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Multi-national convenience store giant 7-Eleven has teamed up with Crocs to produce a line of branded footwear sporting the store’s iconic (but not necessarily tasteful) orange, red, and green logo colors. Those…wow, those are really something. They definitely stand out.

The collab footwear will be available in three styles: the 7-Eleven x Crocs Mega Crush Clog ($110), the 7-Eleven x Crocs Classic Clog ($70), and the 7-Eleven x Crocs Classic Sandal ($50). Of course, because they’re all in such high demand, you have to enter a drawing in order to win the right to buy a pair. And here I thought they’d set the prices so high that only the people who really wanted them would buy a pair. Boy, was I wrong?

Hey, different strokes for different folks — that’s what I have to remind myself. Granted, I’m not sure whose stroke these are or why, but to each their own. I’m not here to judge; I’m just here for a Slurpee and a Slim Jim.

[via FoodAndWine]