As we learned from the movie Gremlins, if you’re going to bring a mogwai into your house, there are three simple care instructions you must follow: “First of all, keep him out of the light, he hates bright light, especially sunlight, it’ll kill him. Second, don’t give him any water, not even to drink. But the most important rule, the rule you can never forget, no matter how much he cries, no matter how much he begs, never feed him after midnight.”
That all said, I’m not sure that this Gremlins Gizmo Chia Pet is a good idea. After all, you have to water it and give it sunlight if you want its greenery to grow.
Do the Chia Pet people want all hell to break loose? I mean all of a sudden, you’re gonna have tiny chia mogwai popping off of Gizmo’s back, and pretty soon you’ll have a hundred of these things taking over your kitchen. Perhaps it would be a better idea just to leave him sitting there looking cute and avoid the urge to use your green thumb. If you do by some chance decide to water your Gizmo Chia Pet, remember to keep him out of the direct sun or you’ll kill him in your efforts to make your plant grow. Did that rule ever make you wonder if mogwai were vampires? Can mogwai see their own reflections? Do they hate garlic?
And yes. Never, ever feed him after midnight, or your terracotta planter and its offspring will turn into evil gremlins and wreak havoc on your entire neighborhood. Though the idea of a striped gremlin with a chia plant mohawk does sound kind of cool.
